And yet…

I should really just not look at myself in the mirror in public bathrooms.

I mean yes, wash my hands and all of course, but I really need to avoid looking up and viewing myself under the glaring flourescent light that blatantly reveals every imperfection I have ever had, anywhere on my person.

Because I will inevitably pick, poke, prod or postition. I’ll lean in close to the mirror to inspect the yellow spot on my tooth that I’d never noticed before or to poke at a pimple (yes, gross), or OHMIGOD is that a black hair growing out of my CHIN????Or I might stand back, pull my shirt up and poke at the loose skin on my stomach to see if I can make it not pooch out under my sweater. Or brush dandruff out of my hair and dog hair off my ass. Or maybe even adjust the girls so they’re not all off-kilter after 200lbs and 2 kids.

And always, ALWAYS, someone will walk in. And there will be this awkward moment as a stranger or a coworker looks at me bent over with one hand down my shirt while the other jiggles my bra cup or an inch away from the mirror trying to pluck the errant hair from my chin (seriously, what is that?) and I laugh nervously and mumble some random excuse for being found in such a compromising position. And I quickly shuffle out and spend the next 10 minutes mortified and praying I don’t see that person again for at least another half hour (or longer depending on what exactly I got caught in the middle of…).

And yet…

I continue to do it. Like the freaking Ponies, I can’t help but look. And then I have to fix it. Whatever is wrong (and there is always something) I have to attempt to make it go away, which of course makes it worse 99% of the time. So I end up embarrassed with an angry red blotch on my face tragically highlighting the pimple I was just trying to get rid of. funny-awkward-dog-shower-cap-bulldog-pics

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. yourothermotherhere
    Jan 29, 2013 @ 06:54:49

    Funny!

    Reply

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