Text message parenting

I got annoyed at The Zen Master again last night. I again got stuck being “the bad guy.”  After sitting in the living room with a headache for several minutes waiting for someone to respond to my request that someone else take care of The Peach because I was eating.  I gave up and grabbed her and stomped down the hall,  spilling my beer all over the floor and The Zen Master. I angrily went in her room and proceeded to gag my way though changing a poopy diaper. Here’s the funny part (not really funny but the correct word escapes me), I wasn’t gagging at The Peach’s poop, gross though it might have been. The vile smell that was turning my stomach was the odor of The Beast’s cat box, across the hall in Princess Punk’s room. I don’t really know the last time she changed it, I know it was more than a week ago since that’s when I bought the bag of kitty litter that still sat in the hallway unopened. I was truly disgusted. She sleeps in there. I could smell it all the way down the hall. And I’d been telling her for several days she needs to do that. It’s one of her regular chores that she is supposed to finish before she gets any screen time. But I’d been working later and not been policing her, and apparently, neither was The Zen Master. And she changed the litter this time. Rather quickly. And when I got upset with her about not actually washing out the litter box that had been stewing in piss and shit for over a week, she got mad and told me, “You never told me to do that, you’re just saying that because you’re all pissy.” Which I thought was kinda weird since the chore list on the wall says very clearly she is supposed to wash the box out once a week. Because it’s gross.

Throughout this entire exchange The Zen Master was on the couch, silent.

I gave up on family time and finishing my dinner and took The Peach into my bed to try and get her to sleep. Which she thought was a stupid idea and proceeded to scream for 10 minutes. The Zen Master finally came in and took over (he had been paying bills at least, not playing a game) and I lay there and fumed for a bit. And then I griped. The same conversation… No, conversation would imply he talked too. The same… bitch-fest that I’ve expelled several times before, about how I need him to be the bad guy sometimes and he needed to enforce the house rules too and I knew I was being a control freak but every time I let go a little bit, nothing got done and I’d have to do it myself anyway. And he said nothing… Again… So I gave up because apparently bitching makes my headache WAY worse. I turned on the TV and put something on Netflix that I hadn’t seen yet and he got up and left.

The following text messages ensued…

Me- So that’s it? Nothing. OK. I guess I’m not surprised because you never say anything. So I’m just going to eat my dinner and try to stop wondering if you’re mad at me.

Him- No, just wasn’t ready to watch that series yet

Which you could have said. Out Loud. I’ll put something else on


I love you

I love you too

I’m sorry my communication skills suck

I’m sorry I emotionally vomit on you

I sometimes think maybe we are a bad example for Princess Punk

We get home and plop on the bed or couch with are devices instead of taking care of our respective chores

I agree. The behavioral therapist actually was just saying we should do something active together as a family

I’m just so tired all the time and I just hurt. And then I whine about it which doesn’t set a good example either

And I do try to clean some when I home midst of the time. And I make dinner

And we haven’t been eating at the table together either

But I am horribly lazy on the weekend

Not to say that I’m great during the week

I guess this was the end of our “conversation” because he came back to bed. Apparently we are only able to have serious discussions via text messaage.

He then proceeded to stare at me and smile while I watched TV and dozed.

I don’t care how much you love someone, it’s still creepy to wake up with them a few inches from your face watching you and smiling.


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