Ok… I give up… Where is she putting all that?

"With extra cheese please."

“With extra cheese please.”

Went out to lunch with My Mom, Princess Punk and Crazy Girl. We went to a pizza place in Stowe that is delicious and has a gluten-free pizza crust option which is awesome. Not so great? It’s in Stowe. So it’s ridiculously overpriced. Still, it wasn’t too bad for lunch for My Mom who paid for everybody. Not going to do it again any time soon but it was definitely good. The Peach got to sit in a booster seat instead of a high chair which she thought was just nifty, especially since she could slump down and make every adult at the table go, “Ohmigod!” and grab her before she did a boneless slide onto the floor. Given the pricey menu, I determined it was more economical to have the girls share something, especially since I was unaware if this was a Food Day or a Not-Food Day. The Peach, like most toddlers, has days where she simply will not eat anything you offer her and will generally have a bite or two of whatever you might be eating throughout the day but not really anything else. And then she has days where she will not only eat anything you give her, she will eat the majority of everything on your plate as well and get royally pissed off when you tell her that “No, Mommy would like to eat at least 1/10 of her own food.” There is no real middle ground. So I didn’t really want to order a $14 individual pizza and have her decide she really didn’t want any thank you very much before politely dropping it on the floor.

I guess it was a Food Day.

This 24lb kid ate more pizza than Princess Punk. I thought she was gonna choke. Princess Punk ordered a personal pepperoni pizza to share with her sister. The personal pizzas there are not small, I can maybe manage a half of one. Pizza came and I grabbed a slice to cut up for the Peach while The Princess calculated her carbs for the remainder. I then made the mistake of putting the plate with the entire piece on it, in front of the ravenous little beast sitting between My Mom and Princess Punk. I looked at my own food for a moment and immediately heard this;

“Holy crap Mom, she just shoved it all in her mouth!”

That’s what she said… Anyway…

Yes, 15 seconds prior, that plate had a slice of pizza on it the size of my hand.

15 seconds prior, that plate had a slice of pizza on it the size of my hand.

I was astounded. I knew she was capable of chipmunking food, but I had no idea the extend to which her gullet could expand. IMAG0987





I was actually pretty impressed… Although quite wary. Given her father’s predilection for overindulgence induced emesis (Thank you college education… And yes, showing off just a teeny bit), I was half-expecting a nauseating revisit of her pizza.

She drank half of My Mom’s water and it was all good.

Greedy little Shit.

Greedy little Shit.

I made sure The Zen Master got diaper duty the next day.


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