Heartbroken…

My sweet Princess. I got another letter today. She was not happy.

And I know, that the reason she is not letting herself have a good time is because of what My Mom did. She’s worried and moody and I AM SO FUCKING ANGRY.

Because we planned this for months. We struggled and planned and begged and pleaded for financial assistance. We did everything we could to make this happen. And she needed this. My Princess needed to be able to have a good time, with other kids like her. Who are dealing with The D-Monster just like her. She needed to relax, and have fun, and not be so fucking different from everyone else.

And instead? Instead, she left home crying and worrying. And is still worried. And most of her letters seem to indicate that she is not having a good time and just wants to come home and she’s still worried.

And I’m heartbroken. Because this amazing, caring child has taken on the burden of putting her own happiness underneath the happiness of someone who just doesn’t want to be happy. And God Damn It, she doesn’t deserve that.

I get it. I’ve had my own share of meltdowns that Princess Punk has been witness to, my own fuck ups that left my kid picking up the pieces of her shattered mom. And I really hate that.

But this? The timing of this?

I cannot even express how angry and frustrated and fucking heartbroken I am for my child.

I’m going to go tickle The Peach now so maybe I can dry up these hot, angry tears and smile.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: